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Sunday, April 22, 2007

Everything I ever needed to know, I learned from The Sound of Music

- Having trouble sleeping? Count raindrops on roses.
- Needing some new clothes? Try window shopping. Drapes are everywhere.
- CSI on rerun and craving a mystery? Solve a problem like Maria.
- Feeling lonely? Grow Edelweiss. Every morning it greets you.
- Ending a delicate relationship and don't know what to say? So long, farewell, auf Weidersehen, good-bye.
- Depressed? Tie a brown paper package with string.
- Low on cell phone minutes? Buy a whistle. Give your friends their own signal.
- Don't know where to start? Start at the very beginning. It's a very good place to start.
- Want variation in your workout? Run and sing, clicking your heels together periodically.
- Sudden case of amnesia? Go with "me." It's a name I call myself.
- Thinking about dating? Wait a year or two.
- Feeling bad about yourself? Have confidence in sunshine.
- Hearing ringing in your ears? It's a sad sort of clanging from the clock in the hall.
- Want in the Guinness Book of World Records? Climb every mountain.
- Lost in the woods? Follow every byway, every path you know.
- Need a light? Wait for fate to turn the light on.
- Trying to get out of a ticket? Remind the officer somewhere in your youth or childhood you must have done something good.
- Want to start a new business? Get a loan. Nothing comes from nothing. Nothing ever could.
- Planning a Halloween party and need a good location? The hills are alive. That's pretty freaky. I'd check that out first.
- Someone make you mad? Call them a flibbertijibbet.
- Want to know who's gossiping about you? A prince on the bridge of a castle moat heard, men in the midst of a table d'hote heard, and one little girl in a pale pink coat heard.
- Looking for a higher education? When you read you begin with A-B-C.
- Need a man? Join a convent.

2 comments:

Jason said...

This post is genius. It remind me of 'Everything I learned in Kindergarten.'

Tara Lynn Thompson said...

Just wait. I'm working my way through the 70's movies next. Life lessons from Star Wars? Yeah, I got a few. Like...hoping to liven up the family reunion? Get a crush on your twin sister.